In Part III of our series on Decisions, we explore how asking the right questions is a prerequisite to making the best decisions.
35,000. That’s the estimated number of decisions the average adult makes each day. Thankfully, most of those decisions don’t even cross our minds because our brains have spent years looking for patterns and creating habits that allow us to move quickly through decisions. If our brains didn’t do this, we’d be overrun by the options. Our wiring protects us from circuit overload through mental maps and practices. We add ice to our cups before soda, grab napkins and put them on our tray, and throw away our empty wrappers in the trash bin closest to the exit without even registering that we had other choices.
This shorthand to decision-making is advantageous in many situations but can be troublesome in others. For example, when our voices raise the familiar refrain, “That’s how we’ve always done it,” and we shut down new possibilities or when we treat stale mission statements, meaningless core values, and antiquated policies and procedures as organizational gospel. That’s when asking the right questions can help us. In moments when our brains launch us down a familiar or comfortable path, the right questions can encourage us to move from remotely conscious decision-making to fully intentional decision-making.
So, what are the right questions? The ones that serve these purposes:
- Create clarity – by helping us understand what others are seeing, feeling, and thinking.
- Make connections – by looking for relationships between people, ideas, and actions.
- Dive deeper – by asking how we arrived at an observation, feeling, or thought.
- Elevate the dialogue – by raising broader issues and helping us see the big picture.
Let’s look at some of the right questions in action.
Create clarity.
A colleague says they are frustrated with a direct report. We’ve worked with that individual before and recall our own frustration with their bad attitude. We are moments away from suggesting they write up a disciplinary action on that person. Instead, we stop and ask, “What’s frustrating you?” Our colleague explains, “I’ve been encouraging them to take better care of themselves during this crisis. They are working so hard to help others that I’m afraid they’re going to burn out. I guess frustrated may not be the right word. Maybe I’m really worried.”
Make connections.
Our organization feeds children. With schools out of session, we know many children will go without food. We are moments away from using all our resources to feed children this month, with no idea how we will sustain our efforts. Instead, we stop and ask, “Is there another community agency that is feeding children right now? What about agencies that are feeding seniors or other vulnerable populations? Could we combine our resources to create a centralized feeding program that addresses everyone’s needs?”
Dive deeper.
We are interviewing candidates for a new position. Our committee members like two different candidates and have actively shared their opinions. Finally, one committee member speaks up and says, “I like Candidate X, and I think if we hire Candidate Y, we’ll be making a huge mistake.” We are moments away from suggesting that we hire Candidate X. Instead, we stop and ask, “Why would it be a huge mistake? What kind of mistake? What did you see or hear in Y’s interview that led you to make that observation? What did everyone else see or hear?”
Elevate the dialogue.
We are working on our strategic plan. Someone suggests that we open a new service. We talk about how much it would cost, how much revenue it would bring to us, how many employees we’d need, and what kind of space it would require. We are moments away from adding it to the strategic plan and giving it priority funding. Instead, we stop and ask, “Does this service fit within and honor our mission? Is this service a true need in our community?”
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Final Thought: Great decisions are born out of clarity, connection, depth, and elevation. That’s why great leaders ask great questions first!
